My Life and Love
by starstriker92
Summary: A love letter from Victor Nikiforov to Yuuri Katsuki.


**_My Life and Love_**

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 ** _Author's Note:_**

I started my life as a working adult - busy with work nowadays. Gradually lost inspiration in continuing "Towards the next stage of Eros", but once I get my inspiration back, I will definitely continue writing! Rest assured that if YOI has a Season 2, I will definitely be writing so much more (:

If any of you has Y **uri on Ice Amino** , feel free to follow me! My username is **Airika** (with a star) :DDD Let's fangirl over YOI together haha! I do post my fanfics there as well, and also to share some YOI updates (Yes, since I became a working adult, a part of my salary went into buying merch. LOL)

Meanwhile, hope you enjoy this short fanfic from me~ (:

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 ** _Synopsis:_**

 ** _A short fanfic depicting a love letter from Victor Nikiforov to Yuuri Katsuki._**

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 ** _"Life and Love" – These are the two things that I have neglected for over twenty years of my life. I found that in you, Yuuri Katsuki._**

After I became your coach, learning about your life and love has opened new doors into a brand new world that I'd never known before.

I grew to understand the parts and pieces of your life – your past and present. In the entire process, I have watched you grow and develop as a figure skater, and you provided me with lots of life lessons that I had always felt that I was lacking.

 _It was you who made my once boring life, exciting again. You were always someone who never failed to surprise me._

I remembered our first encounter, after the Grand Prix Finals last year. I had wrongly assumed that you were another one of my fans as I happily offered you a commemorative photo. However, you had such a sad look on your face as you turned your head around and walked away.

I was left frozen in my spot as I could not believe my eyes – _Me, Victor Nikiforov getting rejected? That had never happened to me before._

 ** _Little did I expect that I would see you again – on that very same day._**

My eyes naturally caught up to you again at the banquet party that was held later that night. I was so intrigued about you that I had to ask around – I got to know that you were a Japanese contestant who participated in the same event as me, and that you had suffered a crushing defeat. At that point of time, you looked as if you were unwillingly dragged by your coach to attend the banquet…!

Well…that was what happened at first. You did not want to mingle with the others, and kept drinking champagne, glass after glass. You got so drunk that you initiated a dance-off with Chris, Yurio and I!

I was so surprised by your sudden change in attitude, but I had so much fun watching your dance-offs. We had the chance to dance together as well, and I had a whale of time. ( _I keep the photos and videos in my phone, so I can show you anytime you want, Yuuri!)_

Never had I attended a banquet afterparty with this much excitement. In your drunken stupor, you clutched me tight as you started to mumble in your own language. All I understood was just one sentence that continued to echo in my head whenever I had thoughts about you. It was the only sentence that you probably had unconsciously spoken in English, as you stared right into my soul with those innocent puppy eyes.

 ** _"_** ** _Be my coach, Victor!"_**

Your words instantly shot an arrow to my heart – so much that I could feel my cheeks burning up. _Since we were fellow competitors, wouldn't you want to become my rival instead? Why did you want me to become his coach?_

I had invested my entire life in figure skating, and I had never once thought of that option before. That amazing night soon became a passing dream that started to etch somewhere deep inside my heart.

As you already know, I continued the rest of my figure skating season that year sweeping all the remaining titles as the reigning world champion. Although my efforts were well-recognized, my heart was not truly happy.

Deep in my heart, I had resigned myself to my public persona as the figure skating living legend – Victor Nikiforov. I had the technical skills to back up my performances, but I lost the inspiration to create new programs. I was not as motivated as before and the current me at age twenty-seven, could not surprise anyone at all.

 ** _Retirement had crossed my mind at that moment in time, but my heart was still unwilling to let go of my past._**

It was until I watched that viral video of yours, Yuuri. The very video that connected you to me. You were imitating my free program, _"Stammi Vicino"_ and I felt that you did an even better job than me. _Why was someone as good as you, not competing for the rest of the skating season?_ The forgetful me had a sudden epiphany – I clearly remembered the words that you had told me a long while back.

 _"_ _Be my coach, Victor!"_

 ** _Yes, you wanted me to become your coach, and I decided to follow my heart's desire. I wanted to be the one to help you achieve your dreams._**

Without a second thought, I found myself booking a flight to Japan. I bid the angry Yakov goodbye as my mind was already made up.

 ** _That was the best decision that I had ever made, Yuuri – because I got to be closer to you._**

I love your country, Yuuri. It's an amazing place with great food and friendly people, especially in your hometown of Hasetsu.

Living at Hasetsu was like heaven on earth – I get to bathe in a bath bigger than any tub, and I also get to eat all the delicious pork cutlet bowls I want! Most importantly, I had the chance to get to know you a lot better. It was pretty hard to get you to open up to me, Yuuri. At the very beginning, you kept on avoiding me whenever I tried to flirt or become intimate with you. Yes…especially during my first night in Hasetsu when you broke my heart entirely into pieces – I wanted to sleep together with you and Makkachin. _Why did you reject me? I wanted to ask you that question someday if I get the chance_.

 **My crush on you, gradually developed into feelings of romantic love.**

Do you remember the time we spent together at the beach in Hasetsu? That was the first time I've had spent some quality time alone with you. We had a meaningful heart to heart talk, and I got to see the real you – a skater who lacks self-confidence, and prefers to maintain a personal distance while interacting with others. _All you needed at that time, was that boost of confidence to gradually open up your heart to others_.

I had asked you what you want me to be to you – A father figure, a brother, a friend or…a lover? I was just trying to tease you for a bit, since the mood gradually got a little too intense. However, your overreaction to that question was just so adorable!

With a determined look on your face, you told me to stay as myself. That was the first time that someone wanted me to act like myself in front of them, and I was just so pleasantly surprised.

 ** _I love that honest part of you, Yuuri._**

Do you remember that very day of the Free Program during the Cup of China? You were so stressed out that you had an emotional breakdown. Remembering back, I could have done much better to help you. I was like a deer stuck in headlights, and that was when I truly learnt of my inexperience as a coach. I never knew how to deal with pre-performance anxiety, and perhaps Coach Yakov could do much better than me in this aspect. My impromptu attempt at reverse psychology backfired on me as it made you even more upset! I will not try this again, Yuuri – I swear. What I want to do is to stay right by your side until you feel better.

My beloved Yuuri, I just want to you to know that you can confide everything in me – whether you are feeling anxious, lost, angry or upset, I want to be the one to comfort you.

I want to shower you with hugs and kisses, and tell you that everything will be alright.

 ** _I want to help you to find your confidence, Yuuri._**

Do you know why I assigned you the Eros program in the first place? Just to let you in on a secret now, but that was on purpose. I knew of your ability to perform to the type of Eros that I had pictured in my head. After all, I thought of you when I started to choreograph that program! Up until the Grand Prix Finals that year, I have watched you perform that routine for many times and believe me, Yuuri – your Eros is always evolving.

Yes, it eventually evolved that much until I have gotten so afraid of my own talent!

 **I love being with you, Yuuri.**

You always seem to go along with my whims, no matter how big or small. With that big heart of yours, you spoil me rotten. It was awkward at first, but we have gotten so close to the point where it became natural for us to hug and kiss each other casually.

I've been in relationships before, but what I have experienced together with you was something so much more.

A single day without seeing you almost felt like an eternity, and I want to cherish our relationship till my last breath.

 ** _I never knew that I could love someone this much, until you came along in my life._**

 ** _Thank you for loving me, Yuuri._**

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 _With all my love,_

 _Victor Nikiforov_


End file.
